Crank Calls
by Veshira
Summary: Vegeta doesn't feel quite right, so he makes a few crank calls and rips off and few movies. . . New Chapter 6 added!
1. Scream

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Scream.  
  
"-" = Vegeta over phone talking  
'-' = off phone talking  
^-^ = receiver talking  
  
  
Vegeta picked up the phone. He felt sick before but then taken some kind of medicane for it. But since he was saiyan it had a side affect. Laughing a bit he dialed a number and the phone rang. A woman answered.  
  
^Hello?^  
  
"Hello."  
  
^Yes?^  
  
"Who is this?"  
  
^Who are you trying to reach?^  
  
"What number is this?"  
  
^What number are you trying to reach?^  
  
". . . I don't know."  
  
^Heh. Well, I think you have the wrong number.^  
  
"Do I?"  
  
^It happens. Take it easy.^  
  
*Click*  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
^Hello?^  
  
"I'm sorry, I guess I dialed the wrong number."  
  
^So why'd you dial again?^  
  
"To appolegize."  
  
^Heh, you're forgiven. Bye now.^  
  
"Wait wait, don't hang up!"  
  
^What?^  
  
"I want to talk to you for a second."  
  
^They've got 900 #'s for that. See ya.^  
  
*Click*  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
^Hello?^  
  
"Why don't you wanna talk to me?"  
  
^Who is this?^  
  
"You tell me your name I'll tell you mine."  
  
^I don't think so.^  
  
"What's that noise?"  
  
^Popcorn.^  
  
"You're making popcorn?"  
  
^Uh-huh.^  
  
"I only eat popcorn for movies. . ."  
  
^Well, I'm getting ready to watch a video.^  
  
"Really? What?"  
  
^Oh, just some scary movie.^  
  
"You like scary movies?"  
  
^Uh-huh.^  
  
"What's your favorite scary movie?"  
  
^Um. . . I don't know.^  
  
"Ya have to have a favorite. What comes to mind?"  
  
^Um. . . Halloween! You know, the one with the guy in the white mask that walks around and stalks babysitters?^  
  
"Yes."  
  
^What's yours?^  
  
"Guess."  
  
^Um. . . Nightmare on Elms Street!^  
  
"Is that the one when the guy had knives for fingers?"  
  
^Yeah! Freddy Crooger!^  
  
"Freddy, that's right. I like that movie. It was scary."  
  
^Well, the first was, but the rest sucked.^  
  
"So. . . you got a boyfriend?"  
  
^Ha. Why? You wanna ask me out on a date?^  
  
"Maybe. Do you have a boyfriend?"  
  
^Mm, no.^  
  
"You never told me your name."  
  
^Why do you want to know my name?^  
  
"Cause I wanna know who I'm looking at."  
  
^. . . What did you say?^  
  
". . . I wanna know who I'm talking to."  
  
^That's not what you said!^  
  
"What do you think I said? . . . What? Hello?"  
  
^Look, I gotta go!^  
  
"Wait! I thought we were gonna go out."  
  
^Well. No. I don't think so.^  
  
"Donthanguponme!"  
  
*Click*  
  
*Ring*  
  
^'Shit!'^  
  
*Click*  
  
^Hello?^  
  
"I told you not to hang up on me."  
  
^What do you want?!^  
  
"To talk."  
  
^Well, dial someone else, okay?!^  
  
*Click*  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
^Listen, asshole-!!^  
  
"No, you listen you little bitch!! You hang up on me again and I'll gut choo like a fish, understand?!!! Heh. Yeah."  
  
^Is this some kind of joke?^  
  
"More of a game really. Can you handle that. . . blondy?"  
  
^. . . Okay, but my hair's black.^  
  
". . . Play along."  
  
^I can't remember what happens next.^  
  
". . . This is the part were you're running around the house locking doors then turn on the porch lights."  
  
^You know I don't have porch!^  
  
". . . Why would I know?"  
  
^You've been here before, haven't you?!^  
  
". . . Who's this?"  
  
^Vegeta, are you drunk?!!^  
  
". . . How'd you know my name?"  
  
^This is ChiChi!! Idiot! You call me and don't know who your talking to?!^  
  
". . . I think I know what speed dial is now. . ."  
  
^Arg!!!^  
  
*Click*  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
"Hi again."  
  
^What now?!^  
  
"Why didn't you tell me?!"  
  
^I was playing along!! Get some sleep and don't drink or eat anything but water and. . . Eat a sandwich or something!! It'll get rid of the alcohol.^  
  
". . . I'm not drunk!"  
  
^You sure as hell sound like you're drunk!!^  
  
"Am I slurring?"  
  
^. . . No, but you sound high, or something! I gotta go now! Get some sleep!!^  
  
*Click*  
  
*Ring*  
  
^'. . . .'^  
  
*Ring*  
  
^'. . . . Arg!!'^  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
^Hello?^  
  
"Goodnight."  
  
*Click*  
  
^. . . . . . .^  
  
*Click*  
  
  
Who will Vegeta call next? And what movie will he rip off next? You choose. Review please.  
  
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	2. Back to the Future

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Back to the Future.  
  
"-" = Vegeta over phone talking  
'-' = off phone talking  
^-^ = Bulma on phone talking  
  
  
Vegeta had taken ChiChi's advice and had a "light snack", then went to sleep. When he woke up in the morning he had a headache. He got up and saw the clock which said "7:28". 'Dammit. Overslept.' He drug himself out of bed and into the shower. He felt like staying in all day, but got out, dried off, and put some clothes on. He walked downstairs to the kitchen to see if his breakfast was ready yet, but saw nothing was there. 'What the hell?!' He went to see if Bunny was upstairs still, but noone was there. 'Where the hell is everybody?!' He went to the lab to see if Bulma or Dr. Briefs were there, and he might not have found them but he did find some kind of new robots, and they looked like /training/ robots. Vegeta smirked as he picked up two of them and brought them into the gravity trainer to try them out. He put both of them next to eachother and turned the gravity to level 550xCG. After making sure the bots were on, he powered up to super saiyan 2 and fired a small blast at them. The bots exploded instantly, causing damage to the gravity trainer's control panel, and also leaving Vegeta feeling smoked. 'Wow. . . Rock 'n roll. . . . Where'd /that/ come from?' Vegeta powered down to normal stat and walked out of the now broken gravity room. He just past the desk, which is covered with different clocks, when the phone rang. He picked it up.  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
"Yo."  
  
^Vegeta, is that you?^  
  
"Hey! Hey Bulma! Where are you?"  
  
^America!! You know that! We'll be back soon, tonight at 1:15. I made a major breakthrough!!^  
  
"Wait, 1:15 in the morning?!"  
  
^Uh-huh.^  
  
"Woman, what's going on? Where's Trunks? Is he with you?"  
  
^Yeah, he's right here.^  
  
"Ya know, woman, you left everything on all week-!"  
  
^Everything's on? That reminds me, Vegeta. You'd better not try the new traning-bots. I think there's a slight chance of overload-.^  
  
"Yeah, I'll keep that in mind. . ."  
  
As they were talking, the clocks on the desk start going off.  
  
^. . .Are those my clocks I hear?^  
  
"Yeah, it's 8:00."  
  
^Yes!! My expairment worked!! They're exactly 25 minutes slow!!^  
  
". . . Wait a minute! Wait a minute, woman!! Are you telling me it's 8:25??!!"  
  
^Perciously!!^  
  
"Damn! I'm missing Hamtaro!!"  
  
*Click*  
  
Vegeta hung up the phone and ran up stairs to the television, but when he got to Cartoon Network they were showing the ending credits with a certain white and orange hamster dancing around and shaking his butt. 'No!!!!!' Vegeta fell down onto the couch and swore a bit. Ever since Vegeta first saw Hamtaro for the first time, he always enjoyed watching it and making fun of it, and driving himself crazy with his own jokes about it. But now he missed it, and there wasn't anything else to do since he broke the gravity trainer. 'Fourth time this week I've missed that show. Why me?'  
  
He couldn't even remember what he did last night, though he found a hint of sandwich flavor in his mouth when he woke up, but that didn't really help much. 'Damn woman. Damn time machine.' His stomach growled. '. . . .' He sighed and got up, then walked to the kitchen and looked in the fridge for something to eat. Since he wouldn't be able to train today he wouldn't need much food in him. He took a box of powdered-donuts out of the fridge and brought them back to the couch. He jumped from Blue's Clues and some scary little show that had kids that looked like the Flintstones but sounded shitty as hell. Finally he couldn't take it anymore and went upstairs to masturbate. (*Author cracks up*)  
  
He came back down around 10:30 and watched Jerry Springer for a bit. There was a fight going on between a fat white woman, an extremely fat black woman, and some guy that supposily was the white woman's husband and was screwing the black woman, and the black woman was supposily the white woman's best friend that had been living in the white woman's house and had raped her son, and the withe woman was screaming bloody murder, and crying her eyes out as she tries to get past the security guards. As you can image, all that did was make Vegeta feel depressed and he felt also felt like he would through up from the women's fatness, so he took some pills for it and went back to watching the mayhem. 'Goddammit! Why the hell would the guy leave the fat woman for a fatter bitch? I mean, shit!! The other one's something like, 300 pounds!! I could use her for training equiptment!!' Vegeta stopped and thought about that and a few minutes later he was cracking up and telling himself more jokes (I mean, who else would laugh at them? Come on, you know you only laugh at them because he's hot. :P). Laughing, he turned off the tv and picked up the phone.  
  
*Click*  
  
  
Who will Vegeta call next? And what movie or one of my sick days will he rip off next? You deside. Please review. I need ideas!!!  
  
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	3. The Amanda Show

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or the Amanda Show.  
  
"-" = Vegeta over phone talking  
'-' = off phone talking  
^-^ = Goku on phone talking  
*-* = Goten on phone talking  
  
  
Goku was sitting on the couch, sleeping with big ol' snot bubbles flying out his nose. Goten was sitting on the floor, staring at Goku. 'Wow, I never knew you could make so many bubbles without soap!' The phone rang and Goten ran over to it and picked it up.  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
*Hello?*  
  
"Hi, this is, uh, Super Man! Yeah, and I wanted to know if your father would like to join the Justice Friends and help Robin through his homosexuality faise with Batman."  
  
*I don't know what that means, but I'll get my dad.*  
  
'Dad! wake up! Someone's on the phone!!'  
  
'Huh?! What? . . . . Goten, where'd all these bubbles comes from?' Goten shakes his head and hands his dad the phone.  
  
^Hello?^  
  
"Hi, I'm Mr. Cheez of the Super Duper Cheese company, and would like to know if you'd like some cheese?"  
  
^Um, no thankyou.^  
  
"Is your refridgerator running?"  
  
^. . . What?^  
  
"The thing with the food in it. Is it running?"  
  
^Hold on.^  
  
". . . . . ."  
  
^No.^  
  
"Well, then you-. . . Wait, what?!"  
  
^No, it's just sitting there.^  
  
". . . . ."  
  
^So, is this it?^  
  
"Hello, welcome to the Blockblister store. Would you like to rent the new video we got?"  
  
^Wha-?! What is it?^  
  
"Is not Dragon Ball Z, it's Dragon's Ballies!!"  
  
^Dragon's Ballies??!!^  
  
"Yes! It's bedder! Much bedder!!!!"  
  
^I don't know what's going on, but I think there's some kind of mistake.^  
  
"Do you like scary movies?!"  
  
^Why?! Yeah.^  
  
"We're not an Ice Cream shop anymore. We sell Chilli!!"  
  
^Huh?!^  
  
"Look out!!!!"  
  
^Wha-?!?!^  
  
"I love fishes cause they're so delious!! Gone goldfishen!!!"  
  
^What's going on?!^  
  
"Do you know where I am?!"  
  
^. . . No. . .^  
  
"Look behind you."  
  
^Wha?!?!?^  
  
". . . . I'm not there. Muahahahahaha!!!!!"  
  
^Huh?! Dammit, Vegeta!!^  
  
*Click*  
  
"Shit, that was great!"  
  
*Click*  
  
Who will Vegeta call next? And what movie or tv show off the Kid's First Network will he rip off next? You deside. Thanks for the reviews everyone! ^_^  
  
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	4. Dimetapp and Plan RHHS

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or Dimetapp.  
  
'-' = talking  
  
  
Goku and Gohan had been training for a while outside while ChiChi went to the mall. Goten was inside popping bubbles in the living room and desided to join his brother and father. He just got outside in time to see them collede with eachother and they fell on the ground each with spiral eyes and a big bump on the head. Goten sweatdropped and dragged them inside and onto the living room couch. Goku lifted his head and looked at Goten. 'Goten, can you go and get the bottom of pills on the counter that says "Dimetapp"?' 'Okay.' Goten ran into the kitchen and took a bottle off the counter and brought it to them. Goku opened the bottle and took out a pill, dropped it into his mouth, and swallowed. 'Here, Gohan, take one of these. You might feel funny, but that's a good thing.' 'Huh? What do ya mean by /feel funny/ and /but that's a good thing/?' Goku smiled. 'It'll get rid of your huge butt.' 'What?!!!' 'Haha!! Just-haha!!' Goku fell off the couch laughing like crazy. 'I didn't mean to say that!! Hahaha!!!! I meant /bump/, not butt!! Hahahahaha!!!!' '. . . . . Dad. . . that's not real Dimetapp, is it.' 'Hahahahaha!!! It's-haha!- headache medicane! It's makes me feel weird though! Hahaha!! So happy!!' Gohan stared and Goku, then turned to Goten. '. . . . Goten, never ever try this, unless I say you can't have it, okay?' '. . . . Wait, you mean /don't/ try it unless you say /not/ to try it?' 'Yes, that's right.' '. . . . I don't get it.' 'If I'm gay from the drug then I'll tell you it's the greatest thing on earth. If I'm /not/ drugged and running around laughing my head off, I'd have enough brains to tell you it's okay, but also to remember to tell you it's bad, so that you know I can think strait. Get it?' '. . . I think so. You'll be so stupid if you're high that you'll say it's good when it's bad, so you want me to know it's only good if you say it's bad, cause you won't be nutty, right?' 'That's exactly right.' 'But, Gohan? . . . Why's Dad taking out beer?' '. . . . Cause he's gonna get drunk.' 'Oh.' 'Another tihng, Goten.' 'What?' 'If I get high, I want you to hide in our room and lock the door, kay?' 'Oh! Like when we were at Trunks' and Dad and Vegeta found that drug thing in the lab and-.' 'Yeah, like that! So, you know the drill, right?' 'Yep. Get the pillows and head for our room!' 'Kay.' Gohan took a pill out of the bottle and popped it into his mouth. '. . . . .' 'Well?' 'Hold on.' '. . . . .' '. . . I think it's okay, Goten.' 'Okay /good/ or /bad/?!' 'Bad.' 'Phew.' Goku took the bottle away from Gohan and read the back label. 'It says here that you have to wait a little longer if you're under 21. . .' '. . . Yeah, but I'm 18! That's almost there!' 'Hm. . . Let's test it. . .' Goku started to poke Gohan in the stomach in different places, then he used both hands to poke at Gohan's nipples. 'Uh, Dad, what are you doing?' Goku grinned evily and twisted Gohan's nipples really hard. 'Purple nurple!!!' 'Shit! Dad-!' Laughing like crazy, Goku ran around the room being chased by Gohan, who was also laughing like crazy at this point. Goten sighed and ran up the stairs. 'I guess it's time for Re-Operation RHHS! (Run and Hind from to High Saiyans)'  
  
When will Vegeta call? And what movie or popular over the counter drug will the gang rip off next? You deside. Actually, no, not yet. I've already done the next chapter. ^-^ Thanks for reviewing anyway!  
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	5. Bud Light Commercial

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ or the Bud "Wussup" Commerical.  
  
"-" = Vegeta  
^-^ = Goku  
#-# = Gohan  
*-* = Goten  
~-~ = Bulma  
@-@ = All (not Bulma)  
'-' = off phone  
  
  
Gohan had got all drugged and stuff with Goku and were watching football upstairs. Goten was hiding out upstairs with pillows, a bag of oreo's, a cell-phone, a bag of comic books, a sleeping bag, and a pack of juice boxes. He was under the pillows, and with the sleeping bag over his head, and was on the phone talking with a friend from school. 'Yeah, just like when me and Trunks were at the Capsule Corp. . . . . Yeah, I guess I am a little brave, cause I guess you hafta be to help save the world. . . . Huh? . . . . You think so? Well, I think my mom would say I'm too young, but you never know cause she wants Gohan to marry Videl so much. Maybe we could date in the 3rd grade! . . . . . Okay. Bye Palace!' (You /know/ who she is, right? :D) Goten hung up the phone and muched on some oreo's.  
  
Vegeta was bored. Bored bored bored. B-O-R-E-D bored!! He was pissed off and all for no reason, except maybe that the buzz of the Dimetapp wore off, but other than that, no reason. He got a few beer bottles from the fridge and took another pill, and WAH-LA!, he was laughing at the Giants who were losing to the Jets. He took the phone again and hit the speed dial for the Son's home.  
  
*Ring*  
  
Goku looked around a bit.  
  
*Ring*  
  
Goku looked under the couch pillows.  
  
*Ring*  
  
'Dad, do you hear ringing?' Goku looked at Gohan. 'Yeah, the phone! But I can't find it!'  
  
*Ring*  
  
'. . . . It's in your back pants pocket.' 'Huh? Oh. . .'  
  
*Click*  
  
^Yo.^  
  
"Yo, wussup G?"  
  
^Nothin'. Watchin' the game, havin' a bud. Wussup with choo?^  
  
"Nothin'. Watchin' the game, havin' a bud."  
  
^True, true.^  
  
#'Wussup!!!!!!'#  
  
"Yo, who's that?"  
  
^Yo, pick up the phone!^  
  
Gohan walks into the kitchen and picks up the phone.  
  
*Click*  
  
#Hello?#  
  
^Wussup!!!!^  
  
#Wussup!!!!!!#  
  
"Wussup!!!!!!!"  
  
^Yo, where's Goten?^  
  
#Yo, Goten!! Pick up the phone!!#  
  
*'. . . . .'*  
  
*Click*  
  
*Yo. . .*  
  
"Wussup!!!!"  
  
#Wussup!!!!!#  
  
^Wussup!!!!!!^  
  
*Wussup!!!*  
  
Bulma, Trunks, and Bunny were standing in a parking lot by some big car-like time machine. It was all silver colored and Dr. Breifs was trying to fix it some how. 'Bulma, I'm going to need your help here!' 'Hold on Dad, I'm calling Vegeta to tell him what's up.' 'Wussup!!!!!!' 'Trunks! Stop it!! You /know/ how much that annoys me!'  
  
*Ring*  
  
"Hold on. Someone's on my call waiting."  
  
*Click*  
  
~Hello?~  
  
"Wussup!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
*Click*  
  
*Click*  
  
"Wussup!!!"  
  
@Wussup!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!@  
  
*Click*  
  
*Click*  
  
^So, wussup V?^  
  
"Watchin' the game, havin' a bud."  
  
^True. True.^  
  
*Click*  
  
'Mom, what did he say?' 'Bulma?' '. . . . . Wussup. . . . Heh. Heh.'  
  
  
What will happen next? And what movie or beer commerical will the gang rip off next? You deside. Thanks for the reviews and ideas. Writing this is fun! :D  
  
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	6. A lot of Stuff

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ, DBGT, Tuck Everlasting, Barney, Pokemon, Hamtaro, or All My Children. O_o; You never thought I'd update, did you! ^____^ Sorry that it took so long.  
  
"-" = Vegeta  
^-^ = Goku  
#-# = Gohan  
*-* = Goten  
~-~ = Piccolo  
&-& = Yamcha  
@-@ = Bulma  
'-' = off phone  
  
Goku was on the phone with Vegeta who was just on the phone with Bulma a half an hour ago. Vegeta had felt depressed by this (God, hell, no!) and taken more pills (Dammit!! Veggie's huked). Now, Vegeta was hystarical (and drunk) and was /trying/ to talk to keep himself from going crazy.  
  
"She's going to be home in a week. A week!! A week without anyone around, a week with the gravity room busted and a week without cable!! . . . . *sob* I'm gonna die. . . I /so/ gonna die.'  
  
'. . . Wait, you don't have any cable?'  
  
'I was so pissed at the Maury Show that I blew up the cable box, and. . . let's just say that I couldn't use the satellite dish if I tried. . .'  
  
'. . . . What happened to-.'  
  
'Blew it up.'  
  
'. . . . . . Why?!'  
  
'. . . . . I'm going nuts!! I need to do more than sit on the couch, eating pizza! . . . that some sent me as a joke, but still. . .'  
  
'. . . . . Heh, yeah. . .'  
  
'This is nuts!!! What am I suppossed to do all week?!!'  
  
'Uh. . . . Eat, pizza?'  
  
'. . . . .'  
  
'Hello?'  
  
'Please, a moment of silence for the pizza guy I blew up earlier.'  
  
'. . . . .'  
  
'. . . . .'  
  
'. . . . .'  
  
'Okay, that's enough, screw the guy anyway. Zitted little punk. . .'  
  
'. . . . .'  
  
'. . . *sob*. . .'  
  
'You okay, Vegeta?'  
  
'I miss them!! Crap, and I drunk to much Robintussin. . .'  
  
'I /think/ it might also have to do with all that beer. . . but, that's just me.'  
  
'*sob* Shit! Dammit, Bulma, now how the hell do I fix up this place?!'  
  
'. . . I'm Goku.'  
  
'Shut up!! I'm talking to myself!'  
  
'. . . Oh.'  
  
'*SHPOOF!!**BANG!**CRASH!!**CLASH!!*BROOM!!**CRACK!!**BOOM!!!!!!!!*'  
  
'. . . . . . . . . .'  
  
'. . . . . . . . . .'  
  
'. . . . What was that?'  
  
'. . . . . . . . The tv.'  
  
'. . . . . But, you said you didn't have cable.'  
  
'. . . . . .'  
  
'. . . . . .  
  
'. . . Shut up!'  
  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
~Hello? Who is this? This is Piccolo.~  
  
#/Pik/koro-san! /Pik/koro-san!#  
  
~Gohan!! You stop-!~  
  
#Dai dai dai dai dai!!!!!!#  
  
~Gohan!! Shut up!!~  
  
#Suki!!!#  
  
*Click*  
  
*Beep beep beep, beep beep beep beep!*  
  
*Ring*  
  
~Hello?~  
  
#KONNICHI WA PIKKORO-SAN!!!!!!! GOHAN DESU!!#  
  
~Goddammit, Gohan!! Stop calling me!!~  
  
*Click*  
  
*Beep beep beep, beep beep beep beep!*  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Ring*  
  
*Click*  
  
~This is the Satan! Would you like be BURNED IN HELL?!!~  
  
#Konnichi wa Mista Satan-san! Videru kitsune desu!!#  
  
~*slaps forehead* NO, THE OTHER SATAN!! THE DEVIL!! AND I DIDN'T NEED TO HEAR THAT!!~  
  
*Click*  
  
*Ring*  
  
~DAMMIT GOHAN!!~  
  
*Piccolo!!!*  
  
~. . . . Goten?!~  
  
*Piccolo, I need help!! Serious help!!*  
  
~What happened?!! Goten?!~  
  
*Remember when I took you about the time when me and Gohan were at the Capsule Corp. and Dad and Vegeta got high?!*  
  
~. . . . The pillow story?!~  
  
*Yeah! My dad and Gohan are high!!*  
  
~You stay there and hide in your room, until I get there or the drugs ware off. Which ever comes first.~  
  
*WAIT!! YOU DON"T GET IT!! MY DAD JUST INVITED VEGETA OVER NOW!!!*  
  
~. . . . . . I'll see what I can come up with. You stay there and don't open the door until I call back.~  
  
*Thankyou Pikkoro-san!!*  
  
*Click*  
  
  
'So Vegeta, how ya doing?' Vegeta stared at Gohan like he was from another planet. Oh, wait, that's right. He /is/. . . Does this planet count as another planet? He shook his head and desided to forget about that. Gohan frowned. 'What's wrong?'  
  
'What do you think?! I'm out of cable and hamsters, and I have noone to train with.'  
  
'Hamsters?' Vegeta's face went pale. Gohan's eyes widened. 'You. . . "eat" hamsters?' Gohan's face paled and he covered his mouth. 'No. . . not hamsters. DAD!! THERE"S A HAMSTER EATER IN THE HOUSE!!!' Gohan turned tails and ran into the next room. Vegeta sweatdropped and fell over, then got up rather quickly.  
  
'I DO "NOT" EAT HAMSTERS!! NOW GET BACK HERE!' Gohan stuck his head through the enterence.  
  
'You. don't. eat. hamsters?' Vegeta nodded and Gohan whipped his eyebrow. 'Wow, that scared me for a second'  
  
'Oh, give me a break!' Vegeta put his hands on his hips and began walking around the kitchen when Goku ran down the stairs with a broom in one hand pointing foward, a garbage can lid in the other hand like a shield, and a pot over his head with a Hamtaro sticker in the center. Vegeta and Gohan fell over. Goku put the garbage lid under his armpit and lifted the pot a bit so they could see his face.  
  
'Where's the emergency, Gohan?' Gohan got up and dropped, scratching the back of his head with his hand. Vegeta barely sat up and stared at Goku with wide eyes. He looked over at him. 'Oh, here Vegeta. What's up.' Vegeta fell over and fainted. The Son's stupidity does not mix well with booze.  
  
  
In the US, Bulma and Dr. Briefs trying to fix the time machine when a couple of boys came around the corner. They wanted to use the parking lot to play baseball, but Trunks scared them away when he hit the ball through a car. Luckily, noone would believe a child could do something like that, and the time machine looked like a normal car, so noone suspected them. A few hours past by and it was noon, so the Breifs went out to lunch and were coming back when Bulma desided to call home to see how Vegeta was doing, half expecting him to answer. Instead, she got the following message.  
  
'The number you have dialed is not avalible at this time. Please hang up and re-dial or try again later.'  
  
*Click*  
  
'What the hell?' She dialed Yamcha's number and it rang a bit before he picked up.  
  
*Click*  
  
&Hello?&  
  
@Hey, Yamcha!@  
  
&Oh, hi. Wait, didn't you go to America?&  
  
@Yea, and I need to ask you a favor. You weren't up to anything, were you?@  
  
&No, I was just. . . sleeping.&  
  
@. . . Yea, sure. . .@  
  
&You saying I'm 'doing things'?&  
  
@Look, I called for a reason. Do you think you could go to the Capsule Corp. and see if everythings alright with. . . it?@  
  
&What about Vegeta?&  
  
@I'm sure he could take care of himself for one week. . .@  
  
&Yea, I guess so. Okay, I'll go over there later and call you back, okay?&  
  
@Kay, thanks. Bye bye!@  
  
&Bye.&  
  
*Click*  
  
Yamcha turned back to the tv and turned off the Sailor Moon doujin he'd been watching. 'Shit.' He got up and got dressed in his yellow outfit (the same one he wore at the tournament) and he left for Capsule Corp. in his car (like he needs one. . .). He parked in front of the building and walked to the enterence of the Briefs homing part of the building. He began to knock on the door but then he saw inside and freaked out. The television had been blown up, the couch was missing, and the walls were blacken from smoke. The enterence to the other rooms were practicly blown away and were big holes in the wall.  
  
'Vegeta!!' Yamcha punched the door til it fell down and he ran inside searching for Vegeta. 'Vegeta!!' He went in the kitchen and saw at least a hundred empty boxes of pizza piled in the corner and the refridgerator had been blown up too. 'Wait, if something happened to Vegeta I would have felt his ki, right?' He sighed and looked around the house. The only rooms that were damaged were the kitchen, living room, and the gravity trainer. The gravity trainer was no surprise, but how did he blow up half the kitchen and half the living area? 'Oh boy. What do I do now? . . . . Look for Vegeta?' (Duh.) He closed his eyes and searched for his ki, but his eyes snapped open when he felt it. 'He's with Gohan?! Oh man, I don't know whether this is a good or bad thing. . . I'd better check it out. . .'  
  
  
'Crap! I hate this show.' Vegeta was trying to find something to watch on tv while Goku went on a beer run (lol!). Gohan was trying to get high by balencing a pot on his head, which kept falling off and he would blast it before trying again. He eventually gave up and sat down next to Vegeta. He looked at him. 'Did it work?' Gohan shook his head. 'No.' Vegeta shrugged and kept flipping threw channels. They started watching anHe screamed at the television a bit and changed it again. Gohan's eyes widened. Vegeta looked at him. 'What's with you?' Gohan turned to him and grinned. 'I just remembered where I hide some weed before the Cell Games.' Vegeta's eyes grew big too. 'You think it's any good?' 'Sure. The guy that gave it too me told me the longer it's kept, the better it is.' He could have hugged him. 'REALLY?!' 'UH-HUH!' They both got up. 'LET"S GO!!'  
  
They got back ten minutes later and got high and. . . shit like that. They got bored of All My Children and turned on a bootleg of Tuck Everlasting. It was at the part when May killed the man in the yellow suit. (Does that guy have a "name"?! Even in the book, he was refered as "The Man in the Yellow Suit". What's up with that? O_o;)  
  
MitYS: I'm talking the girl to her mother and grandmother now, then I will own these here woods. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!  
  
May: Not on your life, b_st_rd!  
  
MitYS: You think you can keep her here?! Over my dead body! I'll own these woods AND the magic spring AND YOU CAN"T STOP ME!! I"LL MAKE MONEY!!!!! MONEY!!!! I"LL BE RICH!!! I"M RICH!!! AND I"LL ME NAMED RICH!! INSTEAD OF THE STUPID ASS NAME OF "MAN IN THE YELLOW SUIT"!!! I"LL BE "RICH IN THE YELLOW SUIT"!!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!  
  
May: SHUT THE F___ UP YOU CRAZY ASS B_ST_RD!!!! *cracks him over the head with the baseball bat*  
  
MitYS: *falls over, dead*  
  
May: . . . No. . . I just killed a man. . . NO!!!!! HE WAS ALIVE!!!!!! *falls to her knees crying*  
  
Girl (forgot her name ^^; Oopies): AH!!! A DEAD MAN!!! AH!!!! HELP!!!!! I DIDN"T DO IT!!!!! I DIDN"T DO IT!!!!!!  
  
Jesse: THAT"S WHAT YOU GET FOR MESSING WITH THE IMMORTALS!!! YAY!!!!! *runs around Man's dead body cheering*  
  
Tuck: May, you didn't have your coffee this morning, did you?  
  
May: I think Jesse might have drunk it all last night. . .  
  
Tuck: No, that was this morning. He had the munches from the dope he had last night. . .  
  
Jesse: *runs around without pants and his underwear on his head*  
  
Girl: Oh my! *starts clapping*  
  
Other Son (can't remember his name either): . . . .  
  
Fat Police Man: What's going on here? *sees body* Son of a B_TCH!! *takes Jesse and starts slamming him against the ground* CALM DOWN, GODDAMMIT!!!  
  
Girl: HOLD HIM DOWN!! I NEED TO GO GET THE PLAY TOYS!! @_____@ *runs into the house*  
  
Fat Police Man: *starts slapping Jesse* DAMN YOU! PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!!  
  
Tuck: You'd think he'd care more about the body.  
  
May: You think I can get away while he's no looking?  
  
Girl: *comes out of the house wearing a leather p0rn outfit and holding a whip in both hands* Are you ready for me?  
  
Other Son: AM I THE ONLY PERSON HERE THAT"S SANE ANYMORE?!  
  
Jesse: I've been very bad. I think I need a spanking! ^__^  
  
Girl: Let's have a. . . 1. 2. . . SIXsome! ^__^ The dead guy too!  
  
Other Son: . . . this is so wrong. . .  
  
  
#This is a strange movie.#  
  
". . . Yep. . ."  
  
#Where'd you get this?#  
  
". . . . Somewhere. . ."  
  
*Door bell rings*  
  
#*gets up and walks over to door*  
  
#What do you want?#  
  
&Gohan! Hi! Is Vegeta in there?&  
  
#. . . . what if he's not?#  
  
&Gohan, I can feel him in there. He has to go home, NOW! He *pauses* has to help clean up his house. . .&  
  
#Not on your life, b_st_rd!!#  
  
&. . . Gohan? What's with you?!&  
  
#. . . Uh. . . Hold on a sec.#  
  
#*runs into another room then comes back with a baseball bat*#  
  
#DIE B_ST_ARD!!#  
  
#*hits Yamcha with the baseball bat and he gets hit into another dimension*#  
  
#HOMERUN!! Gohan is the greatest baseball player. . . IN THE WORLD!!! BWAHAHAHAHA!!!#  
  
#*goes back inside singing*#  
  
"Why are you so happy?"  
  
#. . . No reason.#  
  
#*sits down*#  
  
  
Goku had gotten the beer and stuff but desided to check out a video store.  
  
^Sweet!! Pocket Monster tapes!^  
  
He bought 5 Japanese Pocket Monsters: Advanced Evolution tapes, the Gundum Wing Movie on dvd, a G Gundum tape, and a Pokemon hat like Satoshi has in the new Pocket Monsters episodes. He skipped turn the woods, not noticing Yamcha's body in a tree as he past it, and started singing the words of the dubbed PokeRap (I won't put them there to annoy ya. :D). He finally got to the house a half hour later.  
  
  
'Okay, lets try this.' Dende and Piccolo were in a special room that Mr. Popo had brought them to. He told them that if they called for someone from any time, they could talk to them. Piccolo closed his eyes and began talking.  
  
~Hello. This is Piccolo. . . Is anybody there?~  
  
. . . . . . . . . .  
  
?-Huh?-?  
  
~Who is this?~  
  
?-Wait, who are you? You sound like Piccolo, but he's. . . Oh, is this mind link?-?  
  
~Yes.~  
  
?-Oh!! Cool! I've never done this before! What's up?-?  
  
~Listen, are you in the Z-senshi?~  
  
?-. . . I think so.-?  
  
~Good. I'm Piccolo from your past. Could I ask you for some help?~  
  
?-. . . Past Piccolo?-?  
  
~Yes, that's right.~  
  
?-Does this mean I get to go back in time with the time machine?!-?  
  
~Uh. . . yes?~  
  
?-Coolies! I'll be there later! What year is it?-?  
  
~2003, June 30th, a year after the fight with Majin Buu.~  
  
?-Coolies! Can I bring a friend?-?  
  
~. . . is your friend strong?~  
  
?-Very! Even stronger than me!-?  
  
~Okay then. . . You know where the lookout is, right?~  
  
?-My friend does.-?  
  
~Then it's settled. Thankyou.~  
  
?-No prob, Pickle! I'll be over in a giffy!-?  
  
. . . . . . . . . .  
  
~I'm not so sure this was such a great idea.~  
  
  
Barney: I love you, you love me-.  
  
"I hate Barney."  
  
#Yea, Barney sucks.#  
  
". . . . . ."  
  
#. . . . . .#  
  
". . . You wanna call the Undertaker?"  
  
#Sure!!#  
  
^*comes in*^  
  
^Honey, I'm home! ^___^ ^  
  
"*runs over and glomps him*"  
  
*both of them fall over*  
  
#Aw, a Kodax moment. ^_^ #  
  
#*feels slighty disturbed for some reason*#  
  
"*starts slapping Goku*"  
  
"DAMN YOU! PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!!"  
  
^OW!! WHAT DID I DO?!^  
  
#AM I THE ONLY PERSON HERE THAT"S SANE ANYMORE?!#  
  
  
Piccolo stood at the Capsule Corp. waiting for something to happen. Suddenly, a light appeared, and it took the form of the famous Hope! time machine. Without the word Hope! Instead, it said in Katakana "Giru Pawaa!". ~What the hell?!~ The time machine landed and the top lifted. Two girls were in there. One of them jumped out and landed infront of Piccolo. She was about 20. She had short black hair, black eyes, and was wearing blue jeans, a red t-shirt, training boots, black gloves with her fingers showing, and tied around her head, an orange bandana. The other girl jumped out and walked over to them. She was about 30. She had her long blue hair in a tight ponytail. She had blue eyes and was wearing jean shorts and a blue t-shirt that said "BRA" in white letters. 'Hi, Piccolo! I'm Bra. I'm the one you talked to earlier.' ~Uh, yeah. Sure. . .~  
  
  
What will happen next? And what movie or television shows will they rip off next? You deside. Thanks for the reviews and ideas. I didn't get the ages wrong! This is a few years after Goku and Shenlog disappeared.  
  
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